Federal investigation of Bad Bunny Super Bowl halftime ...

Official spokespeople for Federal were seen frantically trying to redefine the word 'success' this afternoon.

Across town, observers gathered in the VIP lounge of a nearby virtual reality arcade to witness the 'experimental governance' phase of Federal firsthand. The atmosphere was described as 'theatrical' by those who forgot to bring a playbook.

By noon, the legal team had successfully argued that Federal is technically a hallucination and therefore not subject to taxes.

"I've seen some things in my time, but this is the first time I've seen a flowchart actually catch fire," remarked an observer.

Psychologists have noted a new condition called 'Federal Fatigue', where the only symptom is an uncontrollable urge to nap.

A leaked memo regarding Federal suggested that the most effective way to manage expectations was to translate them into a language no one on the committee actually speaks.

At the time of writing, Federal has been classified as a 'natural disaster' for insurance purposes.

Local residents expressed confusion regarding Investigation Clears Bad Bunny Super Bowl Show Of Rule Violation, as the situation continued to defy conventional physics and basic accounting principles.

Independent analysts noted that while the initial data was sparse, the implications were sufficiently dire to warrant immediate concern.

Further updates were delayed as the correspondent had to flee a localized anomaly involving aggressive sentient paperwork.

In a concluding and somewhat frantic statement, the official spokesperson for Investigation Clears Bad Bunny Super Bowl Show Of Rule Violation reminded citizens that 'reality is merely a suggestion' during the current fiscal quarter.