Every edition vetted by our imaginary ombudsman.
Janet Barrett portrait

Staff Writer

Janet Barrett

Janet Barrett covers fintech confidence theater and startup compliance roulette with the poise of a skeptical banker. Janet follows governance stunts through to the small print no launch event projects. Janet's default setting is trust-but-audit.

10 published articles fintech confidence theater corporate governance stunts startup compliance roulette

Showing 10 of 10 articles

  • AES technicians oversee the installation of WiFi routers as part of the new grid management system funded by the BlackRock and EQT-led consortium's acquisition.

    Energy & Utilities

    BlackRock-Led Consortium Acquires AES To Simplify Power Grid By Installing Four Billion WiFi Routers

    The BlackRock and EQT-led consortium announced today that its $10.7 billion acquisition of AES will fund a nationwide rollout of internet routers to manage...

    · Energy & Utilities,Business & Industry,energy grid,infrastructure investment,utility acquisition,grid modernization,private equity,Business,Us,Elections,Blackrock EQT Led Consortium To Acquire AES For 10 Billion WSJ,satire

  • Google's Project Persistent Potential task force meets to analyze why most Android users haven't adopted Gemini AI features, with preliminary findings suggesting the investigation may require additional subcommittees.

    Technology & Innovation

    Google Forms Task Force to Investigate Why Most Users Still Aren't Using Gemini Tricks

    A 40-member team at Google has been assembled to analyze why the majority of Android users have failed to adopt Gemini's advanced AI features despite...

    · Technology & Innovation,Artificial Intelligence,user adoption,product analytics,feature usage,Google,mobile technology,Technology,Business,Gemini Tricks On Android Most People Still Aren Using Android Authority,satire

  • Berkshire Hathaway CEO Greg Abel announces the 'forever stocks' initiative to shareholders in Omaha, as designated company symbols display with permanent heraldic icons on the main ticker.

    Finance & Banking

    Berkshire Hathaway treats Apple stock like grandma's china in new succession plan.

    Berkshire Hathaway CEO Greg Abel announced in his inaugural shareholder letter that four cornerstone holdings will be treated as perpetual assets, with...

    · Finance & Banking,Business & Industry,Berkshire Hathaway,Corporate Governance,Shareholder Policy,Investment Strategy,CEO Announcement,Business,Economy,Markets,Berkshire Hathaway CEO Suggests These Companies Are Forever Stocks And That Might,longform,column,satire

  • Lachlan and James Murdoch dispute ownership of a promotional foam finger during a strategy session, as documentary cameras capture the exchange for the Netflix series 'Dynasty: The Murdochs.'

    Legal Affairs

    Murdoch Heirs Demand Royalties for Their Unscripted Netflix Dialogue

    The Murdoch offspring have filed a cease-and-desist against Netflix after Lachlan Murdoch identified verbatim transcripts of a 2026 family spat regarding a...

    · Culture, Legal Affairs, Arts & Entertainment, Intellectual Property, Media Industry, Documentary, Copyright Law, Corporate Governance, Business, Entertainment, Media, Netflix Dynasty The Murdochs Trailer Reveals The Real Life Succession Fight To, satire

  • Samsung executive Kang Min-seok demonstrates the Galaxy S26's AI capabilities in a Seoul demo lab where prototype devices automatically summon transportation based on users' unconscious biometric signals.

    Technology

    Samsung Releases New Flagship Phones With Focus On Easy To Use Ai Draws New Oversight Plan Built Around Weekly Emergency

    Samsung executives demonstrated the Galaxy S26's AI capabilities by having the phone autonomously summon rideshare vehicles through what they described as...

    · Technology,Politics,Tech Industry,White House,Markets,Artificial Intelligence,Samsung Releases New Flagship Phones With Focus On Easy To Use AI,longform,column,satire

  • Kim Yo Jong oversees the orderly procession of delegates at the Ninth Party Congress, a key responsibility noted prior to her promotion to full department director.

    Politics & Policy

    Kim Jong Un's Sister Advances After Mastering Party Congress Queue Etiquette

    Kim Yo Jong's ascension to full department director was marked by her efficient handling of velvet stanchions at the party congress.

    · Politics & Policy,Global Affairs & Diplomacy,North Korea,Kim family,political leadership,nepotism,authoritarian regimes,Politics,Economy,Elections,Kim Jon Un's Sister Promoted In Rare North Korea Party Congress France,longform,column,satire

  • Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent reviews a meteorological report from a dedicated fax machine, which he has cited as a primary economic indicator.

    Economy

    Treasury Secretary Bessent credits economic boom to favorable planetary alignment

    Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent attributed Tuesday's market plunge to 'excessive atmospheric pessimism' visible from his office window.

    · Economy,Business,Energy,Elections,Congress,Markets,Treasury Secretary Bessent Delivers Blunt Forecast On The Economy Thestreet Com,satire

  • A scene representing the current state of The Latest Judge Orders Release Of Man Detained During Chaotic Government Center.

    Economy

    The latest: Judge orders release of man detained during ...

    The latest reports on The Latest Judge Orders Release Of Man Detained During Chaotic Government Center indicate that while the original objective has been lost, the commitment to fancy PowerPoint transitions remains unsh...

    · Economy,Politics,Internet Culture,Comedy,The Latest Judge Orders Release Of Man Detained During Chaotic Government Center,satire

  • A scene representing the current state of Doonesbury Comic Strips By Garry Trudeau February 14 2026.

    Science

    Welcome to Doonesbury

    Local observers report that Doonesbury Comic Strips By Garry Trudeau February 14 2026 is now operating at such high levels of bureaucratic density that it has begun to affect local property values. Observers remain cauti...

    · Science,Us,Doonesbury Comic Strips By Garry Trudeau February 14 2026,satire

  • A scene representing the current state of FX Daily Still Searching For A Dollar Pulse ING THINK Economic And.

    Science

    Forex - February 2026

    Experts remain divided on whether FX Daily Still Searching For represents a breakthrough in governance or a very expensive misunderstanding of basic physics. Observers remain cautiously optimistic that the situation will...

    · Science,Us,FX Daily Still Searching For A Dollar Pulse ING THINK Economic And,satire